It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Randomize
