Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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