Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize
