Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Randomize
