So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
