im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
There are leaves in my underwear?
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