So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
