ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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