nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
He has the fingertips of a God
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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