I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
Randomize
