ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
