i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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