im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
