this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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