Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
