What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Randomize
