So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
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i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
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