I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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