Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
