You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
