Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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