I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
We had sex on a dog bed..
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
