is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
