i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
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