You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
