I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Randomize