Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
