Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"