he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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