you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
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