I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
