In the future we'll all be gay
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
you made out with another girl for some wings
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Randomize
