yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
can u get pink eye on your cock?
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
Randomize
