Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
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