Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
