And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
