Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize
