K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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