This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Randomize
