I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
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