mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
Randomize
