I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Randomize
