in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
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