I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Randomize
