the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
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