Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Randomize
