We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Randomize
