guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
Randomize
