Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize