He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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