he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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